When we fell for each other it wasn’t falling at all. It was walking into a house and suddenly knowing you are HOME…. #MyWifeMyLife Now……. Guys go ahead be yourself…… we will be in the bed cuddles, loves and hugs and I’m sure you’re going to see to it that we’re entertained…… Let’s start by arguing that she’s a white girl – yeah that’s a good start…… Get it all out your system! Say whatever it is you want – just know….. We good over here…… #TheGibsons #SheGotHerMasters and #iOWNMyMasters #VoltronRecordzChairman
A post shared by TYRESE (@tyrese) on Mar 18, 2017 at 9:38pm PDT
Naturally, newly married Tyrese has been spending quite a bit of time speaking about his new wife Samantha. The conversations have actually gotten him into a bit of trouble with his core followers: Black women.
But Tyrese is no stranger to criticism and he shall not be moved.
Recently, in promoting his new film The Fate of the Furious in New York, he brought his new bride to join him for a sit down with Jenny McCarthy.
While there, they talked about abstaining from sex sixty days before their Valentine’s Day wedding.
Jenny asked the couple how long they’d been married and Tyrese said, “We been knowing each other for two years but we’ve been married going on two months.”
Jenny: “Have you gone on a honeymoon yet?”
Tyrese: We went on a honeymoon before we got married.
Samantha chimes in, “It wasn’t a honey though, he knows why.”
Jenny makes the porn music noise “I don’t know the story to that one.”
Tyrese: “No, I’ll tell y’all proudly. We got active at a certain point and it was so much magic, we decided to go sixty days without. We became born-again virgins…”
Samantha: “Or tried to.”
Tyrese: “We’re both Christian. And we went from December 14 to February 14. So we did 62 days of no sex. And it was hard…it was challenging.”
Jenny: “But it had to be fun to do that dry humping again like you were in eighth grade.”
Samantha: “He wouldn’t even…it wasn’t even that. We didn’t kiss. No hand holding, no nothing.”
Tyrese: “Well, we kissed I just had to calm you down.”
Samantha: “Oh wow, really? It wasn’t like that.”
Tyrese: “Baby don’t be embarrassed. It was more challenging for you to get through the sixty days than me. Just say it.”
Samantha: “It was challenging. It was hard for me!”
Later in the interview, Tyrese spoke about the importance of premarital counseling and the type of conversations the couple had before they got married.
“We did premarital counseling with a very famous pastor who has a congregation damn near around the world. And people would pay like a half a million dollars for one session. We were supposed to do six. And after we opened up, he asked us about seven questions and literally closed the book and said, ‘Y’all don’t have to come back no more. Our other five sessions are canceled. Y’all have clearly done the work.’ And then he said to me, ‘You have no idea how many people come in here who haven’t had conversation about the most basic, basic things but they are sexually attracted to each other, physically attracted to each other , everything is about the surface and then they end up discovering all of this ratchet, bottom of the barrel bullshit on the other side of getting married and then it just falls apart right in front of you…We both shared. We both were very transparent, even if it embarrassed us. We just put our truth on the table and we allowed for ourselves to say I want to move forward with this based on what I know or not.”
Samantha added, “I did something called informed consent. When you go into a therapist, they’ll be like, ‘This is what the therapy will look like, sessions, this is the type that we’ll go into, sometimes it’s about medication evaluations…’ whatever. And I told him about informed consent. Like, I believe in going into something, you know exactly what you’re getting into. Not all the way. I’m not telling all my secrets on the first date but you know enough about me that you can make a decision that three months down the road, if you find out about me, it’s not like, ‘Ok, I’m done.’ I wouldn’t have wasted all that much time getting to know each other.”
Later, Tyrese explained how they were able to ace those seven questions their premarital counselor asked them. “We went online and looked up all of the questions that are normally asked before our session even started. So we were able to have answers and really open up privately before a third party were to even show up. There were about six of the fifteen questions that we had never even asked each other and we were able to hammer out those questions in person. A couple of them got heated but…gotta get that sh*t out, quick…
Samantha talks about the importance of knowing how your partner behaves in an argument. “When we went to premarital, he said ‘Some couples come in here and they never argued. That’s a red flag. If you’ve never argued or know where your partner can go, or what level they can take it to. That’s a problem. You want to know what you’re getting yourself into.”
Jenny mentioned something about our tendency to project and that’s when Tyrese added,
“A lot of us don’t know it but when we get into arguments with our better half, the level of anger and animosity that can show up, you’re actually screaming at your momma. You’re screaming at your ex wife, ex girlfriends and you’re not conscious of it. What your wife or your girlfriend just did does not justify the level of anger you just took it to cause you are yelling at your momma and you don’t even know it.”
You can listen to both portions of the interview in the audio clips below.
Surprisingly, I’m not too mad at Tyrese in this interview. There are some pretty salient points here. Googling and discussing premarital questions beforehand is a brilliant idea. Realizing that some of the anger we exhibit toward our loved ones comes from some place else, are all pretty valid points.
What do you think about what he said during this interview?
